Running into the arms of Jesus

This morning I woke with a heavy heart. Wanting to lash out at someone for hurting me but also knowing that this is not what God desires from my heart. I woke up after being tortured by a restless night of tossing and turning and dreams that came to visit that were not welcome. I woke with a heart heavy laden and with a choice to make. I could chose to run with this pain, lash out and vindicate my pain with an "I'm right and you're wrong" and you hurt me and it's just not right - or I could choose to run to Jesus and release myself from it all.

My sinful nature of the flesh naturally wanted to run with it. To lash out and carry on in a selfish rage of "how could you" and virtually shaking my finger in disgust and frustration that this incident was even an issue. But again, I knew this was not an attack from Satan but a test from God - would I choose to run from Him or to Him.

Jesus said, "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29)

As my morning began to unfold, I knew I had to make the choice soon or the day would be moving on and I would once again perhaps go on with my life wanting to submit to God only later realizing I failed to go to Him at days break for that renewing of my mind and my spirit. And so with the help of the electronic babysitter (that good 'ol tellie) to keep my 4 yr old busy - I crept away to meet with my maker to take on His yoke because mine was simply failing me and I knew I couldn't go forward the way I wanted to on my own.

I'm not an expert on the bible. I'm still learning where things are when I need them but somehow (like I should be surprised) God always seems to lead me to the place I need to find Him in His word. He feeds me the very food my soul is longing for. From personal experience, I simply can't dispute that the bible is God's living word. After praying and asking Jesus to help me, giving Him my pain, my frustration, my anger and everything else I was restling with, He replied with the love, mercy, grace and guidance that only He can give. He lead me to this.

Thank you Father God for sending your Son to die for me. Thank you for your spirit that lives in me that helps me to find forgiveness for others when I am hurting. Thank you for teaching me what it means to walk with you and to run to you. Thank you Jesus for giving me your yoke this day and sending me your peace through your holy sacrifice. Your arms truly are my resting place.